To the Girl Who is Always Smiling
It's me. And heck yeah I smile a lot. I smile so hard my cheeks hurt. I smile when my heart aches and sometimes even smile harder than my darker thoughts.
I get this question a lot you know. Why do you smile so much? Are you honestly that happy? And often times, my answer to that is, heck yeah I am. I have nothing to be sad about. But that is not always the truth, is it?
So I really wanted to start this differently and honestly. I wanted to write this letter to that girl who always has a smile on her face. Whose eyes crinkle as she laughs and whose sole responsibility is to bring joy to everyone around her. To the girls who is always smiling, I say
Hey. Cry more
Don’t hide how you feel anymore and let it out. Scream really loud and break down those walls. Its okay to be sad, its okay not to laugh so hard. To the girl always crying, I say
QUIT SAYING ITS FINE
It's not , is it? These worries that you have that you shove away are threatening to make a comeback, yet here you are pushing them down some more. You wish they would just probe more, don’t you? Ask you one more time if you are truly fine, and maybe then, your walls will break down, and they’d honestly see you for you? To the girl always saying its okay, I say
LET IT GO
You can’t carry everyone’s problems for them. You cannot be that person who makes everyone happy. You bring hope into their world, but nothing is coming back into yours. To the girl who can't seem to let everyone problems go, I say
Stop pretending. Stop the lies. Stop acting like you’re not losing your mind.
Let someone in. Let people in. That’s the only way you can get help. To the girl who won't stop, I say
Your happiness is divine, and your smile lights up the world. Your positivity is your superpower, and the crinkle in your eyes remind us that every day is worth living and that life is going to get better.
We know what you’re hiding, and we see you. Don’t hide anymore. Merely laugh when you want to and cry when you have to. Brighten everyone’s day and don’t forget to brighten yours as well.
You alone make your sunshine, and you can use that to light everyone else’s light up, just never forget that as the girl who always smiles… you just can't stop smiling.
Writing this was relieving in a way that I can’t begin to explain. Over the past few weeks, I struggled personally with coming to terms with my sadness. The sudden bouts of sorrow I would have because of this idea that I needed to continually be happy.
I don’t know if everyone goes through this, but since I did, I wanted to write about it. I share my heart in this post and at times stopped myself from saying more because I wasn’t always the girl who smiled.
Sometimes I was the angry girl or the bitter one. The jealous friend or the sad one. Now it's different, I know I have a purpose, and that is to spread a smile, each day throughout the world, and that’s what I am posing as a challenge to you as well.
Be intentional with who you relate to. Smile more and Laugh hard. My smile is my constant push that life gets better and dark nights become really sunny days.
So, to that girl who is always smiling… I say smile harder.
That Odd Girl